Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In
by Roger Fisher, Bruce Patton and William L. Ury
Holy crap this book is amazing! Reading this book for the first time blew my mind and I keep going back to it for reminders. It's a super-short book with the very basic and very huge tools that you need to conduct a successful negotiation about ANYTHING, at work, in a relationship, when buying something, in activism, whatever situation you're in. In this day and age there's a widespread assumption that you have to choose between being "nice" (aka letting other people walk all over you, and then resenting them forever) vs. stating and meeting your own needs. The brilliance of this little book is that it shows you how to develop a healthier and more effective pattern of pursuing your goals without getting stomped all over—or being the one to do the stomping. Even if your negotiation ends in no deal, or in some kind of less than ideal compromise, you can at least know that you did your best, didn't give up anything you couldn't afford to, were true to yourself, and were respectful to the other person. And that's a victory in its own right.
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